Wednesday, March 7, 2018

Secret Daughter

Subtitled: "A Mixed Race Daughter and the Mother Who Gave Her Away"
Nonfiction by June Cross

Secret Daughter: A Mixed-Race Daughter and the Mother Who Gave Her Away
https://www.barnesandnoble.com

I have mixed feelings about memoirs; they can be interesting but often are not. People's assessments of their own lives are usually skewed, however they try to be honest.

This is pretty good for a non-celebrity memoir, in that it can (mostly) keep your attention on this author's life even though you don't know anything about her beforehand, but it does get slow at times.

June's main focus, understandably, is on race, and how her white mother sent her away to be raised in the black community, ostensibly for her own good. But instead of letting June's black mother (Aunt Peggy) adopt her and permanently make her a part of their family, June's biological mother keeps her hand in by having June "visit" her "real" home once a year or so. This leaves June conflicted and confused; with her biological mother hovering in the background she can't give her loyalty to Aunt Peggy, who is her real mother in the sense of making her go to school, eat regular meals, take her bath, do her homework, wear her coat when it is cold, and the myriad other things that real mothers do all year long. Meanwhile, her biological mother gets to do fun holiday things with her sometimes, and (to be fair) sends money for her support. It's a very "Disneyland Dad" situation, and I really felt for Aunt Peggy who loved June and tried to be the best mother she could.

So June felt that her trouble was that she was neither black nor white, but kept permanently in limbo between the two, never being allowed to join one culture or the other. I think this is only partially a racial problem in her case, however. The main thing was that her white mother gave her up without ever giving her up, selfishly keeping her straddling two families so that she could not truly be a part of either one.

Still, June was eventually able to come into her own identity, which is what the story is about. All in all, it's a good but not great memoir.

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